Updates and Apologies

Plumpy R. Prouting
Downstairs Bedroom
Mum's House
New Zealand

21 August 2007 (GMT + 12)

To the Cats, Llamas, Birds, and Humans who read my blog,

First I wish to apologise for my silence these last few weeks. I promised you an up-and-coming post and have failed to keep my promise. This is, of course, all Mum's fault. She has banned me from the computer for no reason at all. Further to this insult she has failed to play with me, cuddle me and even on occassion - to feed me. Certainly she will play with me sometimes, cuddle me sometimes, and feed me twice a day - even if it is not until after one o'clock in the afternoon - a full SEVEN HOURS after my breakfast is due! But this is not enough! And I am most seriously depressed.

Some of you have been asking after my health, which I appreciate very much thank you. Mum hasn't asked at all. One time she did say "What's going on now fatso?" but I don't think she was genuinely concerned. My state of health has very much recovered since the surgery (yes I can say it out loud). I miss my eye teeth very much of course but what can a cat do? "Eat dry old biscuits every day" seems to be the answer.
Scaredy - our plan not to ever eat the Science Diet did not work. Mother left me for A WEEK! SEVEN DAYS she was not in the house and The Other Ginge did not feed me anything but the new food. When Mum finally came home she was very very ill and I took pity on her. To make her life a little easier I decided to eat the new biscuits. What a mistake that was folks! Now they are all I am given. In the mornings I am so starving I am forced to gobble them too. I guess the quicker you eat them - the less you taste them. Mother does not appreciate the kindesses I bestow on her. Ungrateful little...well, human I suppose.

You will, no doubt, be wondering what I have been up to as you have been waiting patiently for news. Well, there are some interesting new parts of the house I have discovered. There is a cupboard by the oven. I cannot believe I missed this on the first inspection of the house. I am yet to get in there for a decent exploration but I assure you there will be a fill situation report as soon as I have it sorted. There is also a cupboard downstairs where the water cylinder lives. This is very dry and very warm. It is carpeted, dark, quiet and very very comfortable. I get in there whenever someone opens the door. Mum thinks she is punishing me by closing me in. "That will teach you!" She says. She claims she won't open the door until I have begged for ages to be let out, but I like it in there. She opens the door and chases me out long before I am ready to move! And of course the garage always needs exploring - it changes so often. It is also a dry place and has many interesting smells but it is colder than the house and I don't like being locked in there so much! One of the walls lifts into the ceiling, but it screams when it does so and I don't like that at all! I have sensitive ears!

At the moment I am sitting on Mum's lap and using the laptop. She is studying for her test on Friday, very vigilant of her. I wish she was studying the art of head-scratching. I better seal this off and post it before she sees.

Love to you all,

Plumpy.