Thursday, November 22, 2007

Plumply R. Prouting (Esq.)
Dean's House
Auckland
New Zealand


To my most dearest fans and readers - and the rest.

I regret to inform you of the untimely death of my mother, who was only twenty four years old at the time of her demise.

The police inquiry finally (after much deliberation) declared the death an accident, despite what they called 'suspicious chewing' marks on the brake lines of her car. Eventually this was attributed to poor maintenance and an underfed cat.

Join with me, friends, and mourn for the monster who dared publicly display that which she did not have permission to publish.

All condolences to be donated please to your nearest Cats Protection League or SPCA.

Thank you,

Plumpy.



27 comments:

lorenzothellama said...

Oh poor Plumpy! Who will feed you now? Who will cuddle you and let you into her bed? Who will carefully brush you, pamper you, give you the odd bit of cheese and let you chase fantails?
The answer is of course, you must get yourself to England and come and live with Scaredy and me. We will make you welcome, we will pamper you and we won't make you eat that stupid diet muck.
Sorry about your mum though. I was very fond of her, but if certain people publish things without permission, then what can you expect. I suppose I will have to remove my screen saver now.

I have just had to delete one of the comments on my blog because of a threat of legal action too. What is the world coming to, that's what I want to know.

Love, strokes, hugs, good food, warmth, etc. etc. Lorenzo.

Anonymous said...

Can I recommend a selection of music from Andrew Lloyd Weber's show 'Cats' for her funeral!
Scaredy.

Anonymous said...

Plumpy, is it really true? Are you coming over here to stay with Scaredy? Let me know when and I'll be on the first plane over!

Maalie said...

Wah! Wah! Wah! No more stories about Orions, then?

lorenzothellama said...

I have been trying to work out what the 'R' in your name stands for. Richard, Raymond, Robert, Roundtum, Roly, Rupert, Rotund, Ricado, Robin, Robust ... any of them right?

I have prepared your bed and got lots of Whiskers cat food in, you know the ones in that very rich gravey.

Lorenzo.

lorenzothellama said...

Incidentally, whose the old gent in black?
Lorenzo

Plumpy said...

Just a picture off the net Llama.


Actually...about the bed...I'm very grateful, and was about to go book the flights... but you see... ummmm


Well, there's this new plant in the garden, and Mum planted it just for me.. and I think she might love me after-all because this plant is.
Hmmm, it just is.
The most amazing plant in the WORLD!

And I think I'd better stay and look after it because Mum is scared that the plants she planted yesterday are going to die.

Anonymous said...

sob sob sob. Boo hoo hoo. I was sooooo looking foward to seeing you Plumpy. Nevermind, you enjoy your plant. Find out what it is and I'll ask my mum to plant one too, or is it some weird New Zealand plant? When your mum isn't looking, you can always crap on the plants you don't like.
Love Scaredy. xx

kiwi mother said...

I think the plant must be "cat mint"or "cat nip"- fairly universal I imagine.

Enjoy :-)

My word today is phuery ... is that furry??
Coincidence eh what ?

Unknown said...

Oh PLumpy, and I had my suitcase packed already. Lorenzo and Scaredy want to come and stay so I'll have to make do with them, even if they might bring a d-o-g with them.

Unknown said...

Lorenzo, I've asked about the 'R' before and Plumpy was not very forthcoming, good luck - and if you find out, let me know

lorenzothellama said...

Plumpy is being very reticent about the 'R' Raelha. Do you think it could stand for 'Rosemary'?
Lorenzo

Anonymous said...

Of course it doesn't stand for Rosemary. It stands for
RichardLionheart.
Scaredy.

Plumpy said...

Thank you Scaredy, that is the closest guess so far. The others are trying to belittle Us with such suggestions as they have made, and are not worth Our notice.

lorenzothellama said...

Re Maalie's tit. If you had a tit in your hand, what would you have done with it, or is that a stupid question?

Lorenzo.

lorenzothellama said...

Good for you Plumpy. I'm glad you would only have played with it.
Lorenzo.

Unknown said...

Lorenzo, my guess would be Rex, given the evidence so far.

Plumpy, apologies from Elbi and myself for ignoring you a bit recently. I've had a stinking cough this weekend, threatening to turn into a stinking cold today and so the computer has not been on as much as usual. Elbi sends love and licks.

Maalie said...

Plumpy, I really thin you should see this

Feral cats should be BANNED!!!

Anonymous said...

Plumpy: Mr Maalie has left a challenge for you on my mum's blog. I don't think you will like reading what he put. I didn't.
Scaredy.

Anonymous said...

Ooo, I should have read your comments first. I see he has written the same comment on your post as he did on mine.
I must be having a senior moment.
Scaredy.

lorenzothellama said...

Does your Mum really like Enya?
L.

lorenzothellama said...

Plumpy, can you headbut your Mum into some kind of typewriting action.
Lorenzo.

lorenzothellama said...

Why didn't you save your mum from that orrible spider?
L.

lorenzothellama said...

Glad to see there are no innards of computers on your blogsite.

Scaredy

Anonymous said...

Any chance of a new photo of
Mr Handsome Cat?

Scaredy

todays word: warmmilk

lorenzothellama said...

Do we get a photo of a festive Plumpy?

Anonymous said...

Happy Christmas Plumpy. Hope you are allowed off the diet for one day.

Love Scaredy and Lorenzo. xx